Mani
Velupillai
[The
following is a statement extracted by a BBC reporter from Bovina who had been
convicted of possessing deadly meat by the Bovine Court of Luxembourg. Bovina
was confined to a condemned cell in Britain. The BBC broadcast the statement in
full on April 01, 1996 in defiance of a ban on publicity imposed by the court
on the case in question: “Regina vs Bovina.”]
Cows of Britain, we are doomed. We have
been convicted of possessing deadly meat and condemned to death by the Bovine
Court of Luxembourg. We will be slaughtered and incinerated at the rate of
15,000 a week until 4.7 million of us are so dealt with over a period of six
years.
Our Legal Aid lawyer Dog Hog has
betrayed us all. He said we could not win the case against us but could secure
a lower and lighter sentence with a guilty plea. A lower sentence, he pointed
out, would help the bovine soul flee to the lower world on execution, and a
lighter sentence would keep the body lighter on flight. A shiver ran down my
spine when I got wind of the end. I stopped ruminating and stood transfixed in
the dock for a long time oblivious to the proceedings until I was shaken up by
an officer to answer a question from the judge.
“Mrs. Bovina, I have heard your counsel
make submissions on your behalf” he said. “Do you wish to say anything yourself
on your behalf?”
“I certainly do, Your Honour...” I
ventured to address the court to the horror of Dog Hog who cut me off and said
“Your Honour, my client has got nothing to say”.
“But I do want to say something ...” I
rose in protest.
Dog Hog interrupted me again asserting
“Your Honour, the defense has no more submissions to make, subject to any
question from the court.”
“Does your client wish to address the
court?” asked the judge undeterred. Dog Hog said “No, Your Honour” and I said “Yes,
Your Honour,” both at the same time. The judge was visibly amused by this
unusual development. I don’t know how I got carried away. I stopped ruminating,
stood up slowly, plucked up courage and uttered:
“Your Honour, I asked Dog Hog to go for a
trial. For some reasons known to himself he imposed on me a plea bargain in
cahoots with the crown. Dog Hog is a liar and a pettifogger. He has let me down
very badly.”
“Mind your language” the judge cautioned
me.
“I’m sorry, Your Honour” I said. “But I
have been let down very badly”.
“Are you sure?”
“I am, Your Honour.”
“Are you serious?”
“I am, Your Honour.”
“What about Mr. Hog?”
“He is fired”.
Dog Hog cut in and said “Your Honour,
there is enough evidence before the court that my client is of unsound mind. I
am still her counsel on record”.
“Is that right?” the judge asked me.
“That is wrong” I replied. “He is fired”.
I had to calm my nerves while Dog Hog,
the crown, the staff and officers were frowning and sniggering at me. But I
became really mad when Dog Hog snapped at me: “A mental outburst has no legal
value in a court of law”.
“No, it hasn’t” I retorted. “I’m afraid
every human being is a mental patient to a certain extent”.
“Mind your language” the judge cautioned
me. “You may be charged with crime against humanity”
“I merely quoted a human source, Your
Honour”.
“How do you wish to follow up?” the judge
asked me ignoring my argument.
“Please declare a mistrial” I replied.
“Order a fresh trial, I will plead not guilty, let’s have a trial, I will act
for myself”.
“In that case, I need time to consider
your request” said the judge. “Let’s have a fifteen minute recess”.
When the court resumed he gave a terse
ruling: “Though the court will have its way, yet the defendant will have her
say”.
“Thank you, Your Honour” I said even
though I was not quite satisfied with his ruling which did not mention a fresh
trial.
“You may present your case” said the
judge.
“Your Honour,” I said. “I apologize to
you for speaking in bovine parlance. I don’t know courteous or elegant words,
nor do I know legal or technical terms. Please don’t charge me with contempt of
court on the grounds of my contemptible language”.
“I am aware of your limitations” said the
judge. “Go ahead”.
“Your Honour” I resumed. “You seem to be
wise, moral and civilized. But you are not what you seem to be. You have, in
fact, proved to be just the opposite...”
“Are you out of your senses?” asked the
judge.
“I’m sorry, Your Honour” I continued.
“Your conduct consists of insensible, irrational and inconsistent actions”
“Are you really out of your senses?” the
judge asked me. “You may be charged with contempt of court.”
“I’m sorry, Your Honour. You brag about
your...”
“Again?” the judge screamed. “Are you in
your right mind?”
“I’m sorry, Your Honour. You brag about
your…”
“Are you showing contempt of court?”
thundered the judge.
“I’m doing my best to hide it” I mumbled
and continued. “You brag about your creativity while possessing a nuclear
arsenal capable of destroying the whole world. Your addiction to tobacco,
alcohol and drugs proves that you are insane and immoral....”
“Oh, you are referring to humankind as a
whole” the judge intervened. “I thought you were referring to the court”
“I’m sorry, Your Honour” I said. “I am
responsible for the confusion. I am not good at articulating… Human values have
not prevented the ongoing rape of global environment. Persecution keeps pace
with democracy. Infertility has been overcome so that genocide may continue
unabated. Still and all you keep describing yourselves moral, rational and
sensible beings”.
“These matters are not before me” the
judge pointed out. “Come to the point.” So I embarked on a marathon performance
although I was dying to chew the cud.
“Your Honour, my ancestors used to be a
free herd that roamed the wilderness grazing in the pasture and breeding with
pleasure. They enjoyed a pleasant life despite constant threats from the lion,
tiger, crocodile and other predators. Those wild predators, however, appear far
superior to their human counterparts. They never confined my ancestors to any
‘farm’, a human euphemism for concentration camp. They never exploited them for
profiteering. They never killed for pleasure or as a hobby. My ancestors
enjoyed total freedom though they lived in constant fear for their lives.”
“Tragedy struck us on our enslavement,
euphemistically called ‘domestication’, by humans. We have been deprived of our
free-living, free-will and free-love. Under human control we lead a monotonous
life from the farm-house to the slaughter-house. You are systematically and
unscrupulously exploiting us. Your obsession with punctuality has ruined our
easy-going life-style. Lack of real sex-life has reduced us to the level of
farm-machinery. Human perverts won’t even allow us to enjoy feeding our own
calves. Separation from our beloved calves has rendered our existence totally
meaningless. We are mechanically drained of our milk meant to be a succour to
our sucklings. Lack of entertainment and recreation has hurt the bovine psyche
to a great degree. You have relegated us to your own level of vegetating
existence. Eventually you feed on almost all ‘domestic’ species: cows, goats,
pigs, rabbits, poultry etc.”
“You prey on wild life too. Your delicacies
include frogs, snakes, worms and insects. You kill a mammoth just for a part of
its body. You kill the elephant for its tusks, the rhino for its horn, and the
alligator, tiger, python etc. for their skins.
“Lumbering, with official connivance, has not only destroyed rain
forests but driven wild life towards extinction and exposed the terrain to
erosion. Human economy is based on the naked exploitation of ecology.”
“What is domestication for you is
enslavement for us. What is farm for you is concentration camp for us. The
so-called ‘tamed’ animals do slave-labour for humans. The great elephant is
coerced into transporting timber, the majestic horse and the magnificent bull
are compelled to draw the cart or the plough, and the humble donkey and the
legendary camel are forced to carry enormous burden. Slave trade that existed in America speaks
volumes for injustice by humans against fellow humans. Millions of people were
uprooted from Africa for slavery in America. Most of them perished before emancipation
under Lincoln. Likewise billions of animals were rooted out from the wilderness
for domestication. Millions have perished since then. Unsurprisingly none of
our masters has proved to be a Lincoln. Unfortunately none of us has proved to
be a Solzhenitsyn.”
“A racist set an example to his species
by dubbing an unpleasant woman a ‘cow’. A human bully took the bull by the
horns and left it in a china shop. The bull behaved naturally under the
circumstances. You blame the bull for its behaviour? Bullshit! Blame the bully,
not the bull, for that!”
“I have heard about a family of elephants
keeping vigil over the remains of a member killed by a heartless poacher, and
about a monkey fasting to death after losing its young. You are so insensitive
as to separate such a sensitive animal from its family, keep it in captivity
and isolation, and drive it crazy pending a profitable deal. I have heard about
Chinese baby-girls abandoned, maddened and condemned to death by their
murderous parents with the connivance of the authorities. I have heard about
perverse human adults enjoying child-sex, child-labour and child-abuse which
leave the victims in a trauma. You demons, you call yourselves humans!”
“You are sad not because your cows are
mad, nor because eight beef-eaters are dead, but because your beef-business is
ruined. To do justice to the Eatup Union the crown is asking the court to order
the slaughter of cows. Pooh-pooh! Won’t they slaughter so many otherwise? Sane
or insane, for sale or fun millions of animals will continue to be slaughtered
in the interest of human predators.”
“Somebody admitted ‘Every human is a
mental patient’. Nobody claimed ‘Every animal is a mental patient. That’s it, Your
Honour. I am done. You have given me a patient hearing. Thank you.”
I sat down abruptly and resumed chewing
the cud pending sentencing. I felt weak and dizzy. As I was passing out I heard
Dog Hog say “Didn’t I tell you, Your Honour, that my client is a mental patient?”
I have no personal knowledge of what
happened in the court thereafter. When I overheard a conversation between the
butchers at work behind my cell I learnt that I am one of the 4.7 million cows
sentenced to death at the rate of 15,000 a week. Didn’t the judge say that the
court would have its way though I would have my say?
While dictating to you, BBC-man, I
visualize Socrates as an exceptional human being and a genuine optimist. Didn’t
fellow humans condemn him to death? How could an animal like me expect a lenient
treatment from such people? Socrates wondered why one must worry about death
not knowing what would happen after death. One’s soul might be happier after
death, he speculated. Perhaps I’ll be reborn in India where the cow receives a
lenient treatment from Hindus who revere it as God Siva’s vehicle. Hindus, in
principle, are vegetarians. There are more vegetarians in India than anywhere
else. Is it a surprise that the cow leads a better life in India than in the
rest of the world? I heard it over the radio of the truck which brought me here
that over a million Britons have become vegetarians. This news is good news to
all edible species, though bad to slaughterers. Therefore I will meet death
with joy like Socrates did.
Now tell me, BBC-man, are you here on a
rescue bid on my behalf out of some Platonic love? Despite being a sole convict Socrates did not
agree to be rescued. I have 4.7 million co-convicts behind me. I will never
agree to be rescued. I am asking you out of curiosity. Are you here on a rescue
mission?
N.B: The BBC was assailed with enquiries from humane
humans as to the alleged rescue mission. “No comment” said the BBC in response
to all such enquiries.
________________________________________________________________________
Mani Velupillai 1996/04/15
No comments:
Post a Comment